The Buffalo Sabers won a hockey game! (THIS IS NOT AN APRIL FISH) | This is the loop

It’s April 1, humanity’s annual celebration of lies and deceit. A day to question everything and trust no one, especially here on the internet where every bloody day is an April Fool’s Day. But we promise – cross our hearts, hope to die – that what we’re about to tell you is as real as the matrix air you breathe:

If you’ve followed, you know it’s a big deal. The Sabers’ last victory dates back to February 23. Meanwhile, they went winless in 12 straight games, fired their coach, then lost six more, tying the 2003-04 Penguins for the longest losing streak in NHL history. The 18th loss, a record, came Monday against the Flyers in a game they led 3-0 in the third period before finally losing 4-3 in overtime. Real nightmares aren’t even that cruel.

In the wake of that appalling loss, the Sabers looked destined to set the outright record at 19 Wednesday, but given a second shot against the Flyers – perhaps the only NHL franchise as dysfunctional as they are – they did it. not to be missed, short of emphatic 6-1 winners. The Labatt flowed like wine from heaven.

So let’s take this moment to congratulate not only the players and fans of the Sabers, but the entire city of Buffalo. You are off the hook. Philadelphia, come on. . .

Catherine J. Martinez